The Girl in the Burning Picture

I'm sure other people have notice this in their own lives, but I have started to see that when I look back through my past (recent or otherwise) and I started to notice how different I looked. I don't just mean age changes, by the way, but there was something different to my smile and to my eyes. To most people they would probably just attribute it to my weight gain, which they wouldn't be wrong... but there was also another major change: I was so lost, even though I thought I knew exactly where I was going. I see that girl in the pictures, now that I know what she is to expect in the near future, and I just think, "Didn't you see the signs? Didn't you see that you weren't being yourself? Why didn't you wake up sooner, sweetie?"

I feel so sorry for the girl in those pictures, because right now she thinks life is fine except for an occasional crying war when her husband stays at his family's house later on weekends, or stays later and later at work. I wonder when she finally got tired of telling herself that she was just overthinking... that bad things wouldn't happen to her and him.

People now, they tell me that girl was a fool to have trusted him, but she wasn't a fool... she was in love and believed in him. Looking back, I still don't regret believing in him, or even believing in that still-innocent-eyed girl. What I do regret now is sadly having my eyes pried open sooner than I was ready to see. Maybe that sounds silly, but being in the dark is sometimes so much nicer than having to look around and suddenly see that the world you created was made out of cardboard instead of wood... sand instead of stone. My sandcastle was crashed to the ground by one harsh wave... what a shame? I simply regret not seeing sooner that I should've built that world with stronger foundations.

But the girl in that picture has convinced herself that she is content with the half-life she is living. The life without God, except for a nightly routined prayer; the life without trust, though she reminded herself she trusted him... but he didn't trust her somehow. The girl in the picture was not a fool, but she did act foolish sometimes, because she kept her eyes closed so that picture didn't get burned. It didn't stop the picture from burning, nor stop her castle from collapsing.

Have you ever been the girl or the boy in the picture? I see you... I know your pain. But guess what? I also know what comes after that pain--beauty beyond belief. With eyes open, you now know what you want...  isn't that great? I get to go out into the world with clear vision as I look at those around me, finally seeing who is more likely to hurt me. This doesn't mean that we hide from all the scary things, it just means that now we are better equipped to handle it! How exciting!